Friday, January 20, 2017

Letters to Myla Rae - Your Momma Was a Shortie

Open when -  you feel like all your friends are towering above you.

Dearest Myla Rae,

Yesterday, this photo came up as one of those memory throwback thingies on Facebook. It was taken by my blogger friend Alvin Lim (Alvinology.com) some years ago at an event.
The first thing that sprung to mind was... I look like a juggernaut.... lol.

Then it occurred to me, that it wasn't always that way. Like you, your momma was a shortie. Yes, no word of lie... I spent all my childhood being the shortest kid around.

And I was born a BIG baby. Pushing 4kgs, I was twice your birth weight actually. You, on the other hand was born early, plus I had placenta previa issues which caused the placenta to stop working well in our third trimester. From week 33 plus gestation to week 35 plus, you didn't grow. So we had to get you out. (Look up IUGR if you're curious).

I've always carried this sense of guilt, like it's my fault you were born tinier than you should have. And with that came a whole host of worries as well. But you turned 1 not long ago, and you caught up! You caught up!!!! The doctors at your birth said it would take about 1 year to catch up, but when you were past the halfway mark (about 6-7 months old) and your weight, height, head circumference were still NOT EVEN ON THE CHART... I thought you were never going to catch up. Other preemies who were at the hospital with you (some who started smaller than you even) had caught up already. It irked me when other moms would say things like they're worried that their child is only 10th percentile on the charts.... 10th percentile is within normal range, and it's on the chart! You were in the negatives... you didn't even get a percentile!

Well, at around 10 months (I think) your weight finally hit the 3rd percentile. YAY!!! I was so happy, and it came as a surprise too. And a few weeks ago your 1 year review, everything is on the chart now. Finally. Your weight is now between 10-20th percentile (hooray!), your head circumference is 25th percentile. And your height finally scrapped into the bottom of the chart at 3rd percentile. This will all keep improving this year and beyond. We've got the hang of it now! :)

Despite these gains, you're still tiny for your age. I hate people asking your age, because when I tell them your age, they either exclaim they thought you were much younger, or they give you a funny look like there might be something wrong. Worst of all, suggesting that I don't feed you well enough. *I'm rolling my eyes*

This will probably be something you will face through your childhood and early teenage years. I was a big baby, but a very small child. Every year in primary school, I would sit right in front in the classroom, line up right in front, have to stand in front row for photo taking. It took a long time for me to grow out of my clothes. People always remarking how their younger child was already much taller than I was.

And also one day, much to my mother's mortification, I came home from school with some form stating I could get FREE MILK. Bahahahaaaaaa, I think it was some welfare thing for poor skinny kids who didn't have enough nutrition. My mom (your G'ma) never deprived us of food. There was always hot delicious food on the table every meal time.

I just didn't grow much.

It did impact my self esteem. I was a shy child. I didn't participate in sports... where I fared far worse than my bigger, taller, faster peers. My uniform in lower secondary, was huge and hanging off my tiny frame. I remember this because schoolmates used to tease me about it. :/ My brother who is 4 years younger, started to catch up in height around the time I was 11 or twelve. So we could have passed off as twins, or some would have to guess who was actually older.
Lto R: My cousin (9yrs), Shortie Me (9yrs), My brother (5yrs), my cousin (7yrs)

Whenever we visited my cousins in Australia, for sure there would be comments from relatives about how short I was compared to my similar aged cousins. Holly Jean so short. Harmless teasing... but in retrospect... oh my god... please don't make this kind of comments about children lah!!! They are listening! And it can be damaging to their self esteem.

But then it happened. Puberty. Glorious puberty.

I walked out of school as the shortest girl in class on the last day of term when I was 15. And walked back in to school just 2 months later when the new school year re-opened, and I had suddenly become one of the tallest. From being the shortest female in my family on my mom's side, I'm now one of the tallest (maybe even the tallest, actually). No kidding. I have some wicked stretchmarks (now quite faded thankfully) on the sides of my knees because of this spurt. I didn't get even one stretchmark with my less elastic 34-35year old skin when I was pregnant with you and gained 20kgs. So yeah, that was how phenomenal that puberty spurt was.

I'm not supermodel tall, but I am taller than average. Having those short and runt-ish beginnings made me develop resilience and a thicker skin (kind of had no choice), I am not affected by how people think I look. This would not have happened if I were never a shortie. 
Great-Grandma, G'Ma, Me, and You at 2wks old
So yes my dear, if kids are teasing you because you are short now. Take a look at this picture of your juggernaut mum. Genetically, you are destined to be slightly taller than I am in this picture (based on your dad's and my heights). May puberty be glorious for you too... if a huge spurt happens, great! But if not... then look at the other 2 petite women in that picture. Tiny but mighty. Stronger than I could ever be.

 Love,
Juggernaut mum



Saturday, January 07, 2017

We're in Phuket


We are having a holiday in Phuket... until the 14th. It's day 3 today and it's been raining since last night.... Kwa Kwa Kwa... previous days were spectacular (weather wise).  Tomorrow we head off from Rawai and will go to Kata where there's a bit more buzz. Am looking forward to it because my Favourite street food seller is there hahahah... he looks like Chow from the Hang Over. 😂 And he sells BBQed skewers of prawns, chicken, beef, chicken hearts !!!!! Yummmm
If there are several million typos in this post, I apologise. I'm writing this on my phone while Myla Rae is asleep on my chest. Such a wet day, we can't go to Naiharn beach or the pool even. I miss updating you on the going one in my life 😭. I hardly have the time now to sit at my laptop to type my thoughts away.

Ok update u soon with more pics of the trip once it dries up and we can go out and about ..it's high season so the weather supposed to be good this time of the year  (!!) tmd


Meanwhile, here are some of my Favourite latest articles I wrote on MyFatPocket. Happy reading :)

The 5 Worst Love Moves I Pulled in the past 
Hey, I'm no expert on sex and relationships, it's all a learning journey. But I'm open to sharing my experiences to my readers so hogpefully you can benefit from my mistakes.

5 Hot Older Asian Men of Instagram 
My TOP 5 picks of the hottest older men on Instagram ... Asian version. With the one from Japan being my Favourite 😍.


Sunday, January 01, 2017

A Shit Start to the New Year :(

Ughhhh.... I'm feeling rough as hell. And it's not because I had some wild drunken fun night out.
 
I had no dinner, nevermind, I planned to go to bed early anyway because I was tired. Put Myla to bed at her usual time. Was just winding down and getting ready for my bed. David was in the living room drinking beers and watching Football on tv (Celtics Vs Rangers), shouting at the tv, the usual. Lol.
 
There's lively chatter coming from the balcony upstairs most of the evening, a NYE gathering I guess. And then at 11pm a bright orange flare of lights came from the balcony above ours, and I could hear a crackling sound. At first I thought Oh SHIT, are the idiots upstairs lighting FIREWORKS for New Year's Eve on the balcony?!!!! WTF they're gonna burn my house down. I changed out of my pajamas (just in case I need to grab Myla and evacuate).
 
Then the next moment, a waterfall of hot wax came pouring down onto my balcony. It sounded like water pouring down. Then I checked when it stopped coming down, and realized it's WAX!!!! WTF.
 
By this time, David, with alcohol in his system no less, started shouting from our balcony, "Oi! What the fuck you think you doing?!!!"
 
Then he charged upstairs, and banged on their door. Think they must have shit themselves because suddenly the lights all off, their balcony gone quiet. He was still fuming and told me to call the police, so I rang the guardhouse first ( thinking maybe they could go up and check wtf is going on and please stop dripping hot wax into my balcony! Luckily it was 11pm and Myla is asleep, otherwise she would have been seated in the balcony watching the world go past anyway, no answer from guardhouse, so I rang our neighbourhood police post (The Tanglin one, maybe that's a HQ lol, but it's the closest one I could think of in a panic).
 
The police took a while to arrive (I think because it's NYE, a busy time). By which time I am seriously tired, from the day, and also from trying to calm David the fuck down, and stop him from going upstairs again to confront them. David said he was going to his bed, and tell the police no need to come already, come tomorrow ah. And I'm like I can't do that... they're on the way already. So I waited up. They came just before midnight. Yep rung in the new year with them in my apartment taking photos and statement.

Afterwhich they went upstairs to check what was going on. And then they called for the fire department to go check the upstairs apartment, I think because fire hazard. No one was in trouble, but the fire officers or whatever they're called, advised the neighbours on safe practices and how to avoid starting a fire. The case was logged as an accidental fire. The night is over, thank you, bye bye.
 
BUT, just as I thought ok, bedtime for me now... David was SNORING (he usually doesn't snore) so loudly it woke the baby. And he kept snoring even though I tried to push and prod him to be quiet. So I was kept awake until 3am trying to make Myla get back to sleep.
 
I get up at 5 to give her morning bottle. After which she couldn't go back to sleep (usually after her morning bottle which is dreamfed to her, she doesn't fully wake for it and she sleeps till her 8am breakfast), I guess her routine was broken and the lack of sleep that night just perpetuated itself.

So now, I've just finished cleaning hard wax off my balcony rail, glass and floor. I've scrapped it off with a knife, and then used a hot towel to wipe over. But the balcony floors have a slick slippery feel to them still, and I can't get rid of it. What do I do to get wax residue off the tiles?
 
I am beyond tired today.
What a shit start to my New Year   :( 

Saturday, December 24, 2016

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas to all my family, friends and readers out there!
May god bless you and your loved ones this holiday season and throughout the new year.


Xx

Sunday, December 18, 2016

Saturday, December 17, 2016

Super DIY Cake Smash shoot (under $15 !)

Myla Rae turns 1 tomorrow ! :)

We are not having a party... because... she's too young to know what's going on or even remember this day. Plus she doesn't have like friends to invite. A couple of my friends have similar aged baby girls.. and that's it! Her party would be filled with older kids, and adults. On top of that, I remember my friends inviting me to their kids parties a lot in the past.. and I HATED it. Like such a waste of my time, attending some kid's party. Bahaha...

But to commemorate this milestone, I did a Cake Smash shoot for her at home... so she would have photos to look back on.

Here's how I did everything for $15. (seriously $15 out of my pocket lol)... and lots of fun.

Things I used:
CAKE (spent $10.70)
I bought a $2 pandan chiffon cake.
A $5 tub of vanilla frosting from Cold Storage.
A $1.20 bottle of red food colouring
$2 Icing tool from Daiso
Number 1 Candle I got from Carousell at 50cents.

Just a a few tiny drops of colouring in each bowl to get diff shades.

It's surprisingly easy to pipe on icing. Anyway, it's a cake smash, so messy icing also ok.
 
Tadah!!!!
Outfit (Spent $4)
At tutu dress from China (I bought online 2 months ago and it only arrived a few days before the shoot!! Phew! I did have a back up plan of just wearing a dress she already had in her wardrobe, but thankfully, the tutu arrived in time).

Backdrop (Spent $0)
I used her Parklon mat, the back had a zigzag design which I thought was kind of fun looking. But my second option was just to use a white bed sheet. If you use bedsheet as backdrop, remember to iron the creases out, drumple crumple wont be nice! I don't have any stands, so I just used my clothes drying rack to clip the backdrop up.


Photography (Spent $0)
I used my iPhone camera. And edited using an app called Beauty Plus cos I already had it in my phone, you can use whatever app you are used to using.

Here's a few of my favourite shots!

Headband is cute but she would not keep it on! Argh!
 
Live to eat.. lol


 

Happy 1st Birthday Myla Rae  xxxxx