I don't know if some of you would have had a hunch, or if some friends guessed this already.... I have gotten divorced.
We tried to make things work, but this divorce has been a long time coming. Things haven't been good for years - and it was a struggle for me that kept building. Although daunting, going our separate ways is inevitable, it was just a matter of when, not if.
Over time, the home atmosphere had gotten truly unbearable. For years, I was able to put up with it and make it seem to others that it was a good relationship... perhaps it was a way I tried to cope with things, or kept whatever optimism going that it would get better. Only my closest friends knew the truth, and their support kept me sane.
However, my mindset really changed after Myla came along. I started to consider how it would affect her. And as she got older, saw more and took in more, I reflected deeply about how these influences would be unfair to her.
Divorce is not a tragedy or failure, but raising a child in a bad environment would be - that choice was clear. I will not go into too much detail regarding what happened out of respect for his privacy, so let's leave it at that.
I genuinely wish him well in his future choices. We have put in effort to ensure that Myla will receive the best from the both of us, and discussed the most suitable arrangements. To give abit of detail: she will be in my care and he has visitation access. She also has a tight family network here in Singapore, all of whom have been pitching in so much over the last few months to make this transition easy for her.
My dearest Myla is a happy child and I'm determined to give her the best opportunities and do all it takes to raise her well. I am certain that she will be more than OK. And that this change is for the best for Myla and myself.
I have not told this news to many friends or relatives in person (so most of you would be finding this out for the first time here). To those who were in the know, and stuck by me through those times of turmoil and uncertainty, your support has been one of the most precious gifts I could receive. For that I'm very grateful.
Moving forward, I just want to assure those who may be worried, that I am ready for the journey ahead. I've been refocusing my time on things that matter and ensuring Myla will be raised well. After my prayers and reflection, I am confident this is something I can deal with.
All will be well. xx