Sunday, September 21, 2014

If He Doesn't Want Marriage... and You Do.

This is of course assuming that the girl does want to be married. And I know quite a few who really do. Yet they often leave me wondering why they don't walk away even after they've been outright told that their guy never wants to get married.

Either he genuinely doesn't believe in institution of marriage (rarely the true case). Or he's been married and burnt before (understandably so). Or he just doesn't want to ever close that door on other options (even though he may not be actively looking for another at that moment).
I want marriage and a family, and I've dropped so many good men in the past who even alluded to not being able to commit to that and men who didn't have the qualities to make a good husband. Some didn't even out right say it, yet I was still out of there in a flash... it didn't matter what else they were able to offer me.

Today, looking back, I think I made the wrong judgment call with a few of them. A couple of guys I used to date are now already married and with kids. I really didn't feel they were the sort who would ever settle down so I gave up on them quickly. Either I made the wrong call then, or I just wasn't the right girl for them so they did in fact never want to get married and have family at that point in their lives. (That stings!)
Outfit from BCL


So I want to ask the girls out there whose boyfriends have hinted or worse still, outright said that they never want to get married. If you want marriage, why are you still with him? Do you think that perhaps if you stick around for many years, he will eventually change his mind (maybe possible, but also a risky gamble)?

3 comments:

  1. Anonymous7:09 pm

    i think it's more about not believing that he won't propose (granted things are going well) - i am everything this article is about. been with a guy for 3 years, he knows i want marriage bad but always says "the time will come"

    i'm hoping he doesnt eventually flake!

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    1. It's a gamble my dear. But if say not too bad cos at least he said "time will come" And not that he doesn't want to get married ever. Fingers crossed for u Hugs

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  2. Anonymous6:25 am

    Yes my ex was like this. He didn't want to marry even though we were together for 8 years. It is fortunate that he dumped me eventually (I could never do it). I met my husband a month later and we have been happily married for 4 years. These men who put off marriage are truly the wrong ones for you.

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