Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Shaking Loose That Stage 5 Clinger

The stage 5 clinger is the ex that you just cannot shake loose. They get overly attached, way too fast and then won't move on once the relationship fails. You've been nice because after all, you feel bad about breaking up with them but you're getting tired of them playing that emotionally fragile card over and over again to keep you in their grasp. It's time to move on.. here's how:
1. Be honest.
Cliche as it may sound, you have to be cruel to be kind. No more sugar coating, just deliver the truth. Masking the truth in a bid to protect their feelings will only give them false hope and a bigger disappointment later on. Some times it is you who is the culprit, keeping them clung on because you cannot just tell it to them straight that it is O.V.E.R.
2. Stay away.
Give your ex 3 calls after the break up, after all some people need to contact you to ask questions, shout, cry, etc... it's all part of getting closure. There's no need to specify the 3 call limit, but mentally take note of it. Once  your ex uses 3 calls up, you can stop answering (and don't feel bad about it), don't meet up with her. Just stay away so they can move on.
3. Don't share.
Do not tellyour ex about your life and dating even though they claim to want know about it because they are now your 'friend'. Your ex is very likely going to obsess or worse still, jeopardise your new relationships. Your ex is probably stalking you on Facebook anyway, so there's no need to tell them about your life personally.
4. Don't try to get stuff back.
Tell them they can keep it or throw it out! A stage 5 clinger often devices clever ways to lure you back. Once you meet up, it's never just to return your stuff.... heck it was never even remotely about those objects in the first place. You're just going to have a tougher time pushing them away.
5. It's ok to be hated.
When I was single and dating, hate and anger were the best catalysts for me to move on after my break ups. When you hate someone you see the bad side of them (more than the good), this is reality. Why would they want to stick around or cling on to you, asshole! So yes, let them hate you, don't feel bad about it.

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