It doesn't happen over night, it kind of slowly creeps up on you... the more familiar and secure you feel around your partner, the more you tend to take them for granted. Perhaps you don't bother to buy any of their favourite stuff when you shop at the supermarket.
Or you ignore your partner once you have friends around? When you think of going on a holiday, you rather leave your partner behind. Do you no longer appreciate the effort your partner makes to see you, simply because he/she puts in that effort all the time? Do you need to be treated badly in order to learn to be appreciative?
Do you no longer bother to compliment or be affectionate towards your partner? It is human nature to want to feel secure, valued and loved. It is also human nature to be self-centred and get complacent. There are so many ways in which you can take your partner for granted.
What irks me is that people tend to mistreat the ones who love them the most... because they can.
Some people take their anger out on those close to them. Whether they had a bad day at work, or the waiter was rude to them at dinner, or traffic was a nightmare.... who do they get mad at? Their partner!
Very often partners put up with these sort of moods because they love you. but it's not fair. Do this to anyone on the street, and they will punch you in the nose. If you don't take your anger out on strangers you don't care for or even the very people who made you angry, then why would you think it's ok to take it out on those whom you love?
The thing I've experienced in the past, is that once I am not happy in the relationship, I move on. I don't stick around to be treated like shit. It doesn't happen straight away though... different people have varying thresholds and tolerance of shit. But eventually, they will realise enough is enough one day and leave. And I can bet you that if you have been taking them for granted, they will quite quickly feel so fuckin' good and free once they do leave you.
So if you've been taking your partner for granted, and they have not complained yet, please don't get braver. Do not chuck them more shit just because you got away with it a few times. It all adds up. If you know that you're guilty of this bad habit, break it now or you'll be crying over it soon.
More Relationship Related Reads... Click titles below for my columns last week.