Every time a friend succeeds, I die a little.

-Gore Vidal

A Frienemy (Freh-nah-mee)
1. Friend + Enemy = frienemy
2. A toxic relationship where a person is a friend but subconsciously (or consciously) is jealous of you/ wishes you harm.
When I was growing up, the dynamics of girl relationships was tough! Girlfriends sit with you during recess yet when your back is turned, they try to steal your boyfriend or gossip about you. Girlfriends can be seething with jealous rivalry one minute, and in the next minute, telling you how pretty you look in your new dress.

I do have friends whom I trust, like if i killed someone, i know my best friends F or N would get a shovel and help me dig a hole. (I'm not shitting you)

But I do realise that although I do have some great friends, there are still frienemies lurking around. (I even suspect that some of them leave shitty anonymous comments on my blog even!) Sad and toxic.

Do you have any Frienemies? Have you been double crossed, or betrayed? Are there people around you who are secretly cheering for you to fail?

Are you a frienemy yourself?


  1. The only way to have no frienemies is to fail all the time! Be their frienemy rather than them being yours :P

    But really, you'll never know. I think having an opposite sex as friend is far safer, less to steal and less to be jealous of. I wouldn't say helping someone bury a dead body is a good friend lol but what they do is best for you and yet you need to think for them too cos putting them in a difficult position while they try to help you doesn't make you such a great friend yourself hehe. But! I do believe there are really good friends around, just very rare to find them.

  2. Anonymous8:27 pm

    At least 90% of people I know are frenemies. Check that, I mean girls.

  3. wondergirl12:47 am

    yea its really hurtful.. how do u deal with them?

  4. Wow this post comes in handy cos I've been wanting to ask you whether you have more male friends or female friends. It's obvious ya the good looking and sexy one amongst your gfs so have there been any jealousy at all?

    Females are such strange and insecure creatures. If ya too good looking, they ll be wary if ya gonna steal their bfs or if their bfs will take a fancy to you. Has it been hard for you?

  5. My frenemy was my ex-colleague. She would pretend to be concerned when I'm upset and once she found out the reason, she would blab it to everyone and anyone who would listen. If I refused to tell her, she went around telling people that I had broken up with my bf. She bitched about me to the senior management (those whom she had direct contact with) and yet treated me well in front of me. She's not just toxic, she's psychotic.

  6. Anonymous10:33 am

    My frenemy was my ex college mate and we went to uni together, we even shared a room together in overseas to save cost and I didn't realize until she cheated my money and backstab me to 1 of our friend who told me after that.
    I believe that girls are always jealous of another girl and very seldom they'll be true, sincere best friends.
    I have met quite a few frenemy in my life, not sure whether it's just me or they are everywhere.

  7. I have people like that in my family (my cousins to be precise). They view my pics on face book and spread rumours. Ever since then, i stopped uploading pics on FB and took out a tonne of pics. Also put them on my limited profile list. I guess its easier for me since they live in different countries but amazing how they find ways to hate even with all the distance.

  8. Glad to know tht it's not just me who thinks some people around me are Frienemies...

    Haha.. honestly, I thought the response would be more like - Get over yourself HJ.. You're so vain, you probably think this song is about you... sorta thing... lol


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