Whether it's the first date and you're trying to size him up or you've been dating for some weeks and want to go exclusive, here are some tests women the world over use to figure out if the guy is a keeper...
Why would you want to Test him? What have you got to gain from it?
In order to collect information from a man... you cannot simply ask him. You won't know if he's lying and telling you what you want to hear.... And besides, sometimes it's just too early to ask certain questions.
The Waitress Test
It's been said that when dating, the way an individual treats a waitress or other some other neutral person such as the taxi driver or maid... is the way they will treat you in six months. Trust me, it's a shit feeling being duped during the "honeymoon phase" and 6 months later you're sat there in tears on numerous nights wondering - What did I get myself into?
If they are cheap with tips - you'll never receive anything once the honeymoon is over. Though in Singapore, tipping isn't the norm so it's hard to use this test. But if they whine, complain, criticize, or are rude (!!!) to the waitress/driver/sales assistant etc - that's an indication of how they'll treat you in six months.
A mentally healthy person is consistent, they treat almost all people the same way all the time. So if you see him treat the pretty waitress better than the ugly one or the male one... then that's an indication that trouble will crop up later on.
The Flirt Test
When you're at a party, look at how he socialises. Separate from him, and then watch him while he's solo. If he is just having civil conversation, fantastic. If you see him touching and complimenting and his eyes roving all over the place (click for my post on The Roving Male Eye), that's not good. If you really like him, then at some point after the party talk to him about how that made you feel. Chances are he probably didn't know that his behaviour made you feel bad or was disrespectful. But if he continues to flirt with other women, then he’s being very clear about not only who he is, but about whom he expects you to be.
I recently went to a little event with a date, and there were quite a few girls around. And he did strike up conversations with them. He's just a naturally social person, but just as I was about to bail on this one, I realised that everytime he was talking to someone else, he'd take a long lingering look back at me. Made me feel as if yeah he's got to be polite and talk to other people but i never felt that his attention was not on me. And if while we were talking, if someone interupted us, to ask if we wanted a drink or whatever, he was slow to pull his gaze off me. So... you really have to use your own discretion and gut feeling when testing...
There is another way to carry out the flirt test. You do the flirting instead! If you flirt with other men, see if he will let you get away with it. If he doesn't do anything, maybe he doesn't have confidence and leadership. Or if he does let you know that he's not comfortable with it, then yay! he took notice of you and he actually really wants you to himself...
The Fight Test
When you have your first fight, pay attention to it. You can tell just about everything you need to know about a person by the way they fight. You simply do not know someone until you’ve had a fight with them. How violent? rational? crazy?
How fast and easily does he erupt and how long does the anger last. If he is rational, sticks to the point and actually listens and gives you a chance to explain, then great. But if starts attacking you verbally or physically, then he's not a man, he's a beast.
The Game Test (this one is what my Hair Stylist told me a while ago)
Is he a humble winner?
And more importantly is he a good loser? How a guy loses can tell you who he is... especially if you're the one that beat him! How a man responds to defeat tells you how mature he is.
The Good-Looking Friend Test
Introduce him to a good looking girl friend. See if you can catch him flirting or checking her out.
Ok.. now I'm expecting some people to complain and say that it's wrong to test people and judge them. Blah Blah...
But the reality of the situation is-
Women test men.
I'm just being honest about it.