Cheating Husbands and the Other Woman

Ok. I'm in Oprah mode.

What is it with women who go for married men? And what is it with men who marry one woman yet lust after others?

Something's not right in this world.

I guess married men have affairs because it is a fantasy (and I don't mean fantasy as in handcuffs, whips and crotchless bodysuits) . It is (strangely) uncomplicated. It is real life which is full of complications, and some people want to run away from all that. What he has with the new cow is sex, someone to tell him how much he is needed, affection .... there are no sick days, bills, mortgages to face and no children to raise. It is a fantasy retreat, it is not the real world.

Why would someone want to be the other woman?

Show me a woman. And I'll show you one who is desperate and needy.

Yes. There is not one woman who is not at some point of her life desperate and/or needy. And what better way to validate your prowess and attractiveness than by stealing someone else's husband. Oh... as much as we hate to admit it, we women love competition, especially ones which we win.

My advice (though I know of no one who has bothered to seek any from me in my entire life) is:

  1. If you've made a commitment, then be responsible... just as you would expect that same level of maturity from your partner. Realise that what you get from an affair is not real. You are not going to be a better person... you're not going to get anything real out of it, yet you have everything to lose.
  2. If you are pursued by a married man, please realise that it is a bloody insult to you. I would find it insulting that someone who has made a commitment to someone else, is now channeling affection and attention to me and expecting me to reciprocate and free him from real life. I am a human being and i expect to be treated with more respect and purpose than that!
  3. If he doesn't love his wife anymore... it is none of your damn business. That is something he has to settle with her. Without you in the picture. Do not, i repeat do not let his flirting and lust and attention stroke your weak ego.
  4. And girls, of all the competitions in this twisted world, this is not one worth winning. It's a booby prize. What are you winning here? A man who has no moral fortitude, cannot be trusted and consciously chose to run from reality. Whoo hoo! *ding* *ding* *ding* JACKPOT!


For the sake of clarity of thought and minimal digression, I decided to blog about cheating husbands and the other woman. But you do know that it's just as realistic to change it to cheating wives and the other man. Or cheating husbands and the other man... the possibilities are infinite.

On a lighter note (hey look, a Pun!)... I feel like i'm starting to lose a little weight. hoorah.


  1. Anonymous8:26 am

    if one person tries to stand on two boats. He cannot do so very long. he will either have to give one boat up or fall into the water.

  2. Anonymous10:29 am

    Holly, you write a lot of truths...

  3. Anonymous12:52 pm

    Viewpoints I am glad you have and I share.


  4. But if my wife decides to make out with another jamboo chick in front of me then i will just have to stand there, watch two gorgeous women make out, and feel terrible...yeah..what a cruel world.

  5. The urge to judge is always there and it is hard for me to reconcile what I hear from some of my clients (I am a Career / Life Coach) cos I believe in being monogamous.

    Honestly, I dont think the issue is about the man having the best of both worlds. I see it in alot of my clients who feel that they have outgrown their partner - either emotionally, spiritually, or physically - and felt dissatisfied with their present partner. They would commit 'adultry' mainly to determine if they are really missing out on the other aspects of the relationship and some even found relief from the 'other' person who can 'fill in the gap' for areas that their partners failed to fulfill.

  6. your opinions are straight to point and realistic..very true and every girl should realized the real score about having an affair with a married man..girls should not be mislead with wrong teachings or opinions.they must still stick to what the LORD our GOD taught us from the start.


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