What Do I Check Out In A Man?

Of course, when looking for someone to spend the rest of my life with, there are important character traits to look out for and there's the issue of compatibility and goals etc.

But when I see a man for the very first time, these are the top 10 things I tend to check out before I decide if I want to take it any further.

1. Chivalry

I’m traditional in a sense that women should behave like ladies, and men like gentlemen. I like guys who open doors, pay the bill, pull out my chair for me, take charge of the ordering when in a restaurant, refills my glass before refilling his own. That sort of thing.

2. Shoes
As you probably already know... mismatched CROCS are a definite FAIL in my books. Lol.

When I check a man's shoes out, the brand doesn't matter. But a well made pair of leather shoes does make a man look damn sharp, in my opinion. Of course, depending on the venue, a comfy classic pair of sneakers works too.

And I always check if his shoes are clean.

3. Accessories

Apart from shoes, I also check out his belt, watch and wallet. You may think that these little things don't matter... but I'm sure I'm not the only woman who will check these things out!

Men should always wear belts! It completes their look. Not wearing a belt is like... not wearing socks (eww!). A nice wrist watch is important too... it's one investment that will last you a lifetime. So invest in a good watch which looks good on you (not ultra trendy ones which will go out of fashion).

Wallets are not THAT important (as in the brand etc). But I just listed it here because some years ago, I was mortified when I heard a loud VELCRO (!) sound when my date was paying the bill. He had one of those canvas quiksilver type wallets! *ultra cringe moment*

4. Confidence
Not just in the way he interacts with me... but I find confidence in the way he interacts with people around him very attractive in a man. How is he around other alpha males?

5. Do His Eyes Rove?
Does he check out other girls while I am with him? I know many women don't mind their Bfs/husbands checking out other women... but I find it disrespectful. My eyes don't rove when I am with my partner, he has my attention.
6. Broad Shoulders and Strong arms
I am a sucker for a man with broad shoulders especially. I think six pack type abs are nice, but when it comes to manly bodies, my eyes zero in on the natural breadth of his shoulders. Leave the six pack abs to the scrawny teenage boys or the ultra gym obsessed.

7. A Hairy Chest
This is an odd primal fetish of mine. I'm a woman who loves having a guy with a hairy chest to cuddle at night when sleeping.

8. Short and clean nails
I don't fancy men who have super buffed shiny nails... nor men who have dirty looking untrimmed nails. Just a simple blunt trim is attractive on a man.

9. His Smell
Yes, colognes can work magic. But I also find that I am attracted to men based on their natural scent (pheromones?). Some hot looking dates, I just didn't like the smell off. I find myself attracted to men whose natural scents make me feel cozy and comforted. Strange... but that's one of the things I look out for! I can't explain the scent... but it smells .. well... familiar.

10. Nice Lips and Good Teeth
I cannot be attracted to a man who either has badly chapped lips, or dirty looking teeth. He must have a mouth which makes my eyes linger on it for a few moments longer than usual because I SOOOOO feel like kissing him.
What makes your head spin 360 degrees when you check a man out?

Today's quickie post in my Get Her column is - Friends With Benefits


  1. Anonymous3:25 pm

    I think hairy chest is disgusting.

    LMAO for the Velcro wallet!

  2. Abbie3:43 pm

    Omg I'm exactly like the above except for the muscle toning broad shoulders etc. But the others are exactly what I went for and married lol :)

  3. Now i know how to irritate people! I'll record the Velcro sound and use it as my ringtone!

  4. ahhh I hate those velco wallets too!
    Your 'Top 10' is very similar to mine..i'll probably also include 'a sense of humour'.

  5. Don't really care much about wallets/ belts. But yep, agree about shoulders and chivalry :)

    I also don't like men who talk about themselves too much, he needs to listen well.

    Also not too flashy. Snapping fingers at the waiter is a turnoff, and too many compliments. ugh.

  6. Anonymous12:22 am

    Agree that on the first date, the guy should offer to pay the bill.

    But I'm one of those who doesn't believe that a BF should pay for everything. I offer to foot the bill 50% of the time when I'm out with him. I never let him pay for my shopping or travel expenses. I can't fathom depending on my BF financially in any way.

    Is this common or am I just strange? :S

  7. Anonymous7:33 am

    So totally agree with you for the ten points! I look into every little details too (:

  8. @Abbie- u lucky girl :)

    @Kuen- no no.. it's not Nails on chalk board kind of irritating. It was just shocking tht a grown man had like same wallet like my school mates in the 90s!!!

    @SOF- oh yes! I missed out on tht one... yeah a guy who can hold a crowd with his banter and witt... will make me notice him.

    @Jess- Oh nooooo... have u had snappy fingers dates??? I hate tht!

    @anon12.22- ur not alone. it is pretty common.

    maybe I am the strange one... even when I am paying for the meal, I have trained my BFs to know tht they still have no be the one to call for the bill. I will just slip my card to them and then when the bill comes back, the waiter must pass it to the guy, not me. And then my bf will open it up for me to sign. And tht's it.

    Though... my ex Mark and GB, would NEVER let me pay for any meal. I would return the gesture every week by going to the supermarket and stocking his fridge up, cooking dinners, and for GB, I also bought him nice underwear and clothes all the time.

    some women just repay it in other ways I guess.. it's not abt being financially dependent on a man... cos you know you're not. I just think in more traditional ways when it comes to man-woman roles. :)

  9. Ohh then i shall nail on board my ringtone! But on 2nd thought better not, makes myself cringeEeeeeE..

  10. shucks...
    looking thru all 10 points, i failed for point 3 and 7.

    i use velcro wallets bcos it has a coin (zipped) pocket. and i tailored my pants and jeans in a way i dun need to wear belts. =P

    i def. will wax off if my chest are hairy... =P

    Bernard (D-GUY).

  11. Bernard... ahhhaa... get a normal leather wallet lah. Leather ones have coin compartments too. :)

    as for the belt thing... well.. seems many girls don't mind it afterall! :)


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