Sunday, August 30, 2009

Multi-national Couple Trend

Ok.. lets give this age Issue a rest for a while.

Next thing on my mind is the bi-nationality trend in dating/marriage.

No... I don't mean Malay marry Chinese, Or Indian dating Malay that kind of thing. But the surge in multi-NATIONAL couples. For instance, Singaporean man with Vietnamese/Chinese National woman.... or Caucasian man with Singaporean woman.
I think that we all have our reasons for being attracted to different nationalities. If other people are distressed by your choices, that's their own fault, not yours.


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There’s a running generalization now in our community that the most successful and most beautiful Asian women (and cheap sluts, haha) prefer to date White. We assume this after observing countless instances of successful, beautiful Asian women marrying White men. In our male-dominant male-centric tradition, we blame the Asian woman for the phenomenon.

Personally, I think... for a number of reasons, Asian men have lost the confidence to approach the particular Asian woman they want to date. Any woman they perceive as even remotely possibly maybe out of their league... they will simply walk the other way and admire from afar. While men of other races, especially White men, pursue them left and right. It thus makes statistical sense that these women would date White men, because they’re not pursued by any promising candidates from the Asian race.

In addition, Asian women who, if I may put it delicately enough, are less than conventionally appealing to the typical Asian man (maybe she talks about sex on her blog, or is too tanned, or will bust some balls), will still find avid fans among White men. (Btw, the Asian fetish issue is beyond the scope of this post).

I'm sure men who date women from other nationalities have their reasons too.

If you have a gripe about Singapore girls or men hooking up with men/women of different Nationalities... Your problem is that there is a whole world of independent, dexterous individuals who are actually just not interested in you.

[Ok... this may be the alcohol talking because I just came back from a great champagne and wine and beer type BBQ. But it is a phenomena worth discussing I think!]

11 comments:

  1. Anonymous9:52 am

    girls always want to marry one level up.

    So singaporean marry ang moh.

    and 3rd world country marry singaporeans is a level up for them

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  2. Anonymous12:40 pm

    Us white people aren't so damn special that you need to capitalise the word White when talking about us...

    :)

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  3. Anonymous12:53 pm

    This article is light. It's a great topic but unfortunately the contents lightly breeze through the topic. Disappointment here.

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  4. Anonymous3:17 pm

    Weird coz I've noticed the opposite.

    I've been traveling across Asia for many years and I've always noticed that the most successful and beautiful Asian women are with Asian men.
    I've noted that in Japan, Korea, Thailand and Hong Kong. Can't say about Singapore though as I don't know Singapore well enough. Ya really think Singaporean men don't have enough "confidence to approach the particular Asian woman they want to date"?


    I'm Asian and I travel most of the time with a couple of Caucasian friends (we're about 30 years old) who back in Europe were very successful with women, more than me. Here in Asia my friends can tell you that Asian women are more attracted to me than to them.

    I do agree with your point when you say that lots of Asian women that are not considered to be appealing by Asian men will still find avid fans among Caucasians

    Jeeong

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  5. Anonymous1:02 am

    I'm Asian and I have love only for my Asian brothers.
    Dated white guys before but personally I don't find them as attractive as Asian men.
    That said, I don't find Singaporean men attractive at all.
    Been here a long time but have yet to find one Singaporean guy that really attracts me.

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  6. Gabriel12:27 pm

    Well said, holly!
    After all, it's your choice, and people never fail to judge. But why let their judgment bother you? Its your life to lead and live anyway!

    :)

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  7. Honey and bee8:33 pm

    I'm dating a white guy too.. for coming to a year..and its like every you go, people glare at you with sore eyes.. I'm not too sure how to handle it though, just point them with a middle finger..

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  8. Anonymous8:52 pm

    To me, its always a subconscious attractions. We guys grew up watching GI Joe and wish we were fit like that "white soldier", girls grew up hoping that that "white soldier" will come and save them from harm, thus form the idea in their head that white males are more attractive.

    I can vouch that if a Singaporean man pursue a woman left and right, he is deemed as "despo", "don't know when to give up", "stalker", "disgusting lor".

    But because its a while guy who does the exact same thing, he is "confident", "romantic". They travel half across the globe to come here so when they go all out, local women feel "special".

    Its like, if a local girl throw herself at any men regardless of race or nationalities, "shes a slut". If a white girl does that, shes "hot, sexy" and we feel "lucky". You know?

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  9. anyway in this world noone is perfect . there is no right or wrong in this world . everyone have their own life . what for to bother them . as long as they don't step into my life or disturb my life . i would never let them off . i still love sg gals . gals are everywhere they all come from different background . many have fail in a relationship with others guy while others guys try to take the chance to step in. is really depend on how much she or he love the person . i last time also never give up but in the end i still give up and look for others . life have to carry on but i still contact her . is just based on the feeling among them and us . if there is no chemcial going on what is the point to keep the relationship . and is not easy to maintain a relationship which can last until marry . both parties have the part to play . no matter what is depend on indivial . that all i can say . i fail in many things but i never give up at all . i will just move on because this is life . if i can give my happiness to a gals who deserve my love i will give it to her and only forever . is all depend on both parties .

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  10. Anonymous9:25 pm

    You know, if you've never been in an interracial relationship, it's easy to misjudge. This is an issue my bf and I always talk about. We ask each other, me to him "Why do you like asian women" and him to me "Why do you like white guys." It always starts of with "Cause I think white guys are taller, stronger, masculine.." and "Asian girls are very feminine and petite and a home body.." but everytime it sounds wrong to me and it always ends up being "We found the right person in one another." It had little to do with physical appearances but how much we respected each other and learn from our differences. He pfffs at some of the eccentricities of an asian culture that I want to hold on to and I shake my head at his wild ideas and dreams. We argue and we cuddle. We delight in each others' differences, priding in that this is what will keep the relationship interesting, with us, holding on to a deep sense of individualism. In the end, I find myself nodding in approval at the person that he is rather than the person he looks to be.. although, I think my mom is having a hard time accepting. But that's cause she's never had a chance to know him or understand his background. She's basing a lot of her judgment on stereotypes, like this post and many others talk about. It's still left to be seen.. Oh btw, I'm not dating "up." He's still in school and I'm already in the workforce, therefore I'm paying for almost all our outings and dinners. Dating white don't mean dating up sister. They in no way portray and upper class. Many of them are middle, average, working class citizens. Be weary of your stereotypes. Thanks, me.

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  11. hi , i understand it too . i never in interracial relationship before . i still prefer to love sg gals . i am a working adult too . i did pay meal for gals everytime i date them out . beside that i also need to do some prepare before i date them out . have u ever wonder get a guys wait for a gal whom he never see before . and he waited more than 10hours just to see her and yet she don't believe it . i was silly waiting for a gal more than 10 hours will your guys done that. i will go extreme for my gal. is really depend on your guys. sometime give them a suprise and pamper them once a while . and first date i meet a gal i brought her a LV bag . what would u think ? my way of doing is somehow like white guy do . just that i can't express my language well .

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