Mr What?

I hate small talk.

Whether it's meeting someone for the first time, or bumping into an old school mate on the street. I'm not one to open the conversation based on mundane observations about the weather.

It's not that I'm a rude bitch who just won't talk to anyone. But if it's down to small talk.. or nothing at all, I'd almost always opt for nothing at all. I'll give a friendly smile or "hello", and be on my way.

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If I were seated and waiting somewhere (like a holding room at an audition), I'd strike a friendly conversation with the girl next to me, maybe about eyelashes, or something trivial like that). But I would definitely not stop in my tracks just to engage in small talk with someone when there is the option to just keep walking.

Big as this world may be... I end up being with the exact opposite. Mr Small Talk himself.

Now, don't take this as a rant. I do love him. So much. But I have started to realise that one of the many fundamental differences between us is that he seems to love small talk.

He'll engage in it every single day, be it with the cashier in the supermarket, the construction worker digging up the road (though I have yet to actually see this), the neighbour... the butcher, the baker, the candlestick maker.... ( yes, pretty much anybody who looks at him).

It's not wrong. In fact, it makes him a very friendly, happy, approachable and likable person.

But it's just something I'm not used to ( yet).

Because I'm not like that, does it make me a bad person? When we come down the street, do people think... Oh, here comes Mark. Such a great guy. Shame his GF is such a bitch. (haha... probably)

Does this make us an unlikely pair? Or do opposites attract?

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As you may already know, I've had all sorts of BFs in the past.

I've had The Professor - The one with the least credentials, but talked like he was wise and worldly about practically everything under the sky. (Ironically, this was the one who didn't know I was unhappy and leaving him until the actual minute I broke up with him). Incidentally, this BF also had other alter egos- Mr Print-N-Wank, Mummy's Boy and Mr Rubber Time (he was always at least 30 minutes late. Once, I even waited like 2 hours, and he kept saying "I'm on my way" !!! What? From the moon?!)

Mr Stingy - This one would easily spend like $400 on a pair of jeans for himself. But never took me out for a nice dinner in the years we've been together, not even on my birthday. We mostly ate with my family, or at the hawker center/food court where I paid for my own food. :(

Mr Ladies Man - One of my very first Bfs. Who incidentally ... other women thought were theirs as well!

Mr Butt-Plug - hahaha... no kidding. But he was harmless though. Kept trying to sell me on how all his ex GFs loved to have their butt holes plugged up while having sex. Really not my thing.

I'm so glad to be rid of all of that. I have someone I love, trust (not 100% but getting very close to that now), someone I laugh with, who treats me with patience, understanding and someone I respect. Oh.. and he's ever so punctual!

You know what? I think Mr Small Talk is quite possibly.. in reality, Mr Perfect.