Friday, October 31, 2008

Kissing A Fool

I am a sucker for a great first kiss. It's romantic, you're at the stage of the relationship (if you can even call it that at this point), where you're hopeful, curious and you're mind is very often doing somersaults.
Quite often though... people's first kisses are not the sort which sets off fireworks. It's not so much what you were doing ... but more so what you were doing wrong!
(If the first kiss together was shit... no worries... these things can be learnt!) Read on...

Holly Jean's Top 10 WORST Things To Do While Kissing


10. Try to eat my face

This is not the time to do your impression of a hippo. Leaving saliva on the cheeks, jawline, nose, chin is not sexy or erotic. It's just not.

9. Nut Cracker Lips

Especially for a first kiss, someone who puts too much pressure makes kissing non-pleasurable. Ok.. I know you're strong, you could probably crack a wallnut with those lips, but you don't have to prove anything here.

8. Be a F*cking Owl

Sometimes a short playful look is great... but someone who opens his eyes throughout and stares is downright freaky.

7. Knock knock?

Teeth knocking says you're an awkward fool.
You do have control over your head and mouth, right? So there's no excuse to knock your teeth into mine. Once is forgivable. But any more than that and I'm out of there. It's not sexy, I promise.

6. Jumping in too fast

Whoah... down boy! I actually relish delayed gratification. Even if you're confident, don't make a move too fast. The key to creating that mind blowing first kiss is to let sexual tension build up. Get into their personal space, touch playfully, look into their eyes, and then look away. Be close enough to kiss, but don't. Leave them craving it for a while. :)

5. Missing the boat

While it is vital to wait and build sexual tension... it is just as vital not to miss the boat altogether. You need to use your own instinct, and read your partner's body language. Don't chicken out at the last minute... and be nothing but a tease.
4. Jab Me

The use of the tongue is supposed to be sensual. Do not jab it in and out of someone's mouth like it's a boxing match.

3. Keep Still



What are you, dead?
Use those hands! I find it especially sensual when someone gently holds my face up to his, or caresses my neck and back. I don't like people putting their hands in my hair, it's long, and when it gets tangled in between clumsy fingers, my hair gets pulled! But girls, you can go ahead and slide your fingers seductively through his hair! And don't forget the ears! mmmm....

2. Chapped Lips

Fancy kissing that?

1. Have Bad Breath.


This is the absolute WORST thing that could happen and for me it's a deal breaker. If it's a medical condition, I feel for you. But get it fixed before you attempt to lock lips with anyone! If it's just cause you ate something stinky or something with a bad after-taste, then you're an idiot.
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:) I had such fun creating this post! Especially when picking out the pics.


Coming soon - Worst Things to Do in Bed.

13 comments:

  1. Hey Holly, didn't know you are a teacher! anyway, read your interview in New Paper today. :)

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  2. shiying_Jean@live.com2:20 pm

    It is somehow true about it.I like the pictures.They are nice and cute!!!!!!!!!!

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  3. Anonymous2:28 pm

    I agree with point number 1... hate kissing ppl with bad breath or worse- smell of smoke

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  4. Andrew2:58 pm

    Very nice topic to talk about in your blog again =) And dun worry, i wun make those mistake if i have a chance to kiss you this lovely girl ;P

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  5. Hi Holly,
    I saw the TNP story and I think it was a very nice, balanced piece that on one hand, advocated freedom and space for teachers but on the other, personal responsibility in blogging. Good on you!

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  6. Haha Andrew's so flirty! In a kinda creepy way though.

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  7. Thank you Dee. I appreciate your comment. :)

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  8. Dr D.6:55 pm

    No. 5 is the story of my (love) life.

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  9. awww... Dr D.... there's someone out there for us. Keep on moving on.. you'll find her. And u'll make all the right moves, because it was meant to be. :)

    I'm so optimistic.. cos I am kinda in love now. But wont blog about it yet.. lest i jinx it ... AGAIN

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  10. Anonymous3:38 pm

    I have a jumper-cum-face-eater kissing partner!! LOL. Very unpleasant, and even after all this time of guiding him, he still has got a lot of un-learning to do. What to do...--nn

    Anyway DON'T write about Mr NewLove!!! tell u why...

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  11. bad breath is just a total turn off!! I have to agree with that.

    And your point on people jumping to fast is right..

    Bilding it up (the kiss) is just what makes a kiss perfect!

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  12. btw, you were a teacher?? hahah.. you're my idol. No doubt!!

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  13. Anonymous11:52 am

    i like this post too.makes me remember my 1st kiss

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