"She's the mother of my children...She's as hot as when I first met her 7 years ago (*unsaid* Athough she was 20 pounds lighter, with perky breasts, had no stretch marks and a much smaller bum) and I can't keep my hands off her!" Says the typical politically correct random man.
Yeah yeah...but how many of them actually mean what they say? How many of them aren't lying to themselves?
I don't know. I am not passing judgement. Merely exploring this topic... which worries me somewhat more than it should (seeing that I am far from planning to spawn at the moment)
I have thus come up with a list of myths, facts and tips. Granted, I am no professor of the subject. But do leave your comments, I am interested to know what you think.
Myth 1: Men are attracted to women who are comfortable and confident about their bodies. Yes.. but honestly.. I think we've all seen some girls who look ghastly, yet strut around town as if they're all that. Like the girl with jello abs in a tight mid-riff bearing top. you know the one I'm talking about! So men.. there's a girl confident enough to try to pull that off... does that make her attractive to you?
Myth 2: Pregnancy = looks going to pots. Not every woman encounters drastic changes to her body after pregnancy. You can get your pre-pregnancy body back. (May be extremely difficult) WARNING: I have read from good sources that after the third child, it is near impossible to reverse or naturally repair the damage and stress pregnancy does to the human body.
FACT 1: If you fell in love based on how she looks then there's a likelihood that some body changes resulting from having babies would change how you look at her. You have a problem here.
FACT 2: Most women start making their children a priority. This lack of attention to the spouse may send him crawling else where for attention. Yes, even to the overly friendly barista at Starbucks who chats up customers so they become regulars. He won't see through that... he'll just think he's a Stud. So please... don't leave the poor man out.
FACT 3: Most men would naturally see young women - mostly without children - more sexy than their wives. In some instances that feeling becomes so destructive in the relationship that the marriage ends up in a divorce. Check yourselves men! Be realistic.. remember.. you can't live in a make-believe world and yet maintain the love and satisfaction of nurturing your own family.
TIP 1: If you are concerned about changes in your body since giving birth, the first thing you should do is to avoid comparing yourself with women who haven't. Like duh!
Tip 2: Have a positive self -image! BUT don't just let that exist in your head, while physically, you remain a whale. People (yes, your husband included) will still see you and your blubber. Carry your pregnancy stretchmarks like badges of honour (because they're irreversible anyway). Eat right and exercise to get the weight off.
Tip 3: Don't become a self-less mother and wife. YES! I know you're thinking that I'm selfish. But honestly, I know too many people who indulge their children and husband.. and leave no room for themselves. In order to be a great wife and mother, you have to feel great. That means it's ok to spend that $50 to get your nails done even if it means Skye Junior will have to forgo his 16th pair of baby nike shoes.